Jealousy Isn’t Love – Get Rid Of It!

V:3 I’m jealous of my wife. There’s no reason for it. I know I’m going to lose her if I don’t quit.

Jealousy had gotten the best of Olivia. She wasn’t jealous of her husband, Gavin, but she was jealous of any woman who looked at him. Gavin’s comment to us was, “She’s even jealous when I play with the kids. Frankly, I just want to run, but I need to save my marriage for their sake. If I left, she’s do everything she could to keep me from seeing them.”

Olivia refused to go to a counselor or a psychologist, but she liked our books. Her husband Gavin hoped that we could help her make a change Gary was doing the same thing to his wife. Though she’d never been with anyone else, and although she made sure he was with her when she went anywhere and clearly was in love with the man – he was really jealous. It all came to a head when after church they got into a huge argument because she’d talked to a guy in their small group meeting. It didn’t matter that Gary had been there to see exactly what she had done. No, they hadn’t been talking about anything but the preacher’s morning message. Yes, when Gary walked up, she pulled him in close and put her arm around him.

But Gary’s imagination went wild. He started thinking of all sorts of things that his wife could have been talking about to the other guy during the first couple of minutes of conversation. He demanded to know exactly what had been said, why they were talking and what was said about him. His wife patiently answered the first few questions, but as Gary got angrier, she dissolved into tears, wondering what she had done to deserve this attack. She loved her husband but this had gone too far.

Gavin let his imagination get the best of him. He started thinking of all sorts of things that his wife could have been talking about to the other guy during the first couple of minutes of conversation. He demanded to know exactly what had been said, why they were talking and what was said about him. His wife patiently answered the first few questions, but as Gary got angrier, she dissolved into tears, wondering what she had done to deserve this attack. She wanted to save their marriage, but this was so awful, she wasn’t sure any more.

The root of all jealousy is fear. Fear generates insecurity. Insecurity, in turn, results in possessiveness, and the need to control. Possessiveness and the need to control evidence themselves in jealous behavior. Jealousy will choke the life out of any relationship and can drive even the most devoted partner away, because it creates a prison – not just for the person who is jealous but his/her partner as well. Jealousy does not always turn into abuse but if left unchecked it can. In 1984, a movie entitled The Burning Bed starred the late Farrah Fawcett as the battered wife of a jealous, controlling husband and startled the viewing world. In real life, rock legend Tina Turner, who left an abusive marriage, wrote the story of her miseries in I, Tina, from which the movie, What’s Love Got to Do with It? was made in 1993. If you’re a jealous person, and you want your marriage to survive, we’ll say it as bluntly as we know how – you need to do whatever it takes to get rid of the green-eyed giant. Do not let it take control of your marriage.

Although most jealous people don’t become abusers, some do. In 1984, a movie entitled The Burning Bed starred the late Farrah Fawcett as the battered wife of a jealous, controlling husband and startled the viewing world. In real life, rock legend Tina Turner, who left an abusive marriage, wrote the story of her miseries in I, Tina, from which the movie, What’s Love Got to Do with It? was made in 1993.

Jealousy can show up in the lives of people who otherwise seem strong and in control. They seem to have a need to fasten an iron grip on people, jobs, ideas and attitudes and tighten that grip if anything starts to slip. They can crush the life out of the people and projects they are associated with by smothering them. Learning how to react in an acceptable and reasonable way is the key to solving serious jealousy issues.

Even gentle people can be jealous if they are insecure and fearful. Their jealousy evidences itself in dependency. Others soon tire of their clinging and feel suffocated by their possessiveness, so they find excuses not to be around them. Even the other partner needs to have support to make a change. Envy and jealousy can occur in your relationships with everyone. If you haven’t conquered the demon, you may be unkind toward your spouse’s relatives – especially your mother-in-law. You may even be envious of your husband’s or wife’s successes.

Even gentle people can be jealous if they are insecure and fearful. Their jealousy evidences itself in dependency. Others soon tire of their clinging and feel suffocated by their possessiveness, so they find excuses not to be around them. They, too, need lessons on how to save their marriages. You may struggle with distrust and envy of your siblings, your parents attention to others, and your friends. If you haven’t conquered the demon, you may be unkind toward your spouse’s relatives – especially your mother-in-law. You may even be envious of your husband’s or wife’s successes.

You can save your marriage. Go to www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com. Get rid of jealousy. Our marriage saving material is exactly what you need.

Dr. Vance Hardisty International Speaker and Author Margaret Hardisty International Best Selling Author and Speaker Love Relationship Headquarters www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com

All marriages are worth saving, Save your marriage today, and receive separate help for men. Free reprint avaialable from: Jealousy Isn’t Love – Get Rid Of It!.

The Revolving Door Of Divorce – Marriage – Divorce – Marriage – Divorce – Divorce – Divorce

Some people feel that if they never live with someone outside of marriage, it’s okay to divorce if their expectations aren’t met and then get married to someone else. Modern culture has created a throw away attitude to marriage and difficult relationships. If the second marriage is a bummer, then how about a third – and then a fourth and so on?

It’s kind of like looking for the Fountain of Youth to search for lasting happiness in that way. It isn’t going to be there.

How many celebrities can you name who have very famous, very public divorces in their past? – like Elizabeth Taylor, a star of the past who was one of the most beautiful women of her time and played in many notable movies. Did she even try to save any of her marriages, even those through whom she had children? Or, if she tried, did her spouses?

We’ll give her this one: She always married her interests, rather than just living with them. To keep herself true to her standards that also meant stealing husbands from their wives. At least that was true in at least one case when she lured singer Eddie Fisher away from his then wife, Debbie Reynolds. Eddie Fishers children have acknowledged that this ruined their relationship.

These days Elizabeth Taylor keeps her love life private, but may have given up the marrying philosophy. She reportedly has been living with a guy for a long time at the time of this writing but now, supposedly, is thinking she’ll take her 8th leap into matrimony.

Then there is the mixing up of marriage and lovers, all at the same time. Larry King, for instance. Still married to Shawn Southwick in his 8th marriage, senior Larry supposedly has been having an affair with his sister-in-law, Shannon Engemann, for the past five years. Similar stories of the rich and famous abound. It’s got to be the rich and famous part of it where he’s concerned, wouldn’t you think? He certainly isn’t getting the women by his good looks. (The latest is that he and his wife have decided to save their marriage – possibly because of their two small children.)

So…are these glittering, wealthy beyond measure super stars happy? Come on. We know better. Truly happily married couples know that these feelings don’t last. So, why aren’t their riches and beautiful partners enough? Why aren’t they joyful continually having one sexual partner after another? The reason is because the human being was created by God to be monogamous. Having sex with someone outside of marriage will always bring turmoil to the soul. Promiscuous sex messes lives up and statistics prove it.

True happiness will continue to elude a person or a celebrity that engages in these behaviors. If these types of individuals are happy on earth by some quirk, they won’t be happy after they leave this earth. Everyone has to stand and account for their lives before God. Last time we checked, He made the rules. The rule says, keep it inside marriage.

Last time we checked, He made the rules. The rule says, keep it inside marriage. To quote an old saying, hitch your wagon to a star – but not a star like those we’ve just talked about. Spiritually they are blind and their sojourn on earth, as wild and appealing as it may seem for the time, is very short. Instead, determine to make your present marriage superb. We show you how to do just that in our books and material at the Love Relationship Headquarters.

Dr. Vance Hardisty International Speaker and Author Margaret Hardisty International Best Selling Author and Speaker Love Relationship Headquarters www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com

Do you have relationship problems? You are not alone. Saving your marriage is what we do best , and get separate help for women This article, The Revolving Door Of Divorce – Marriage – Divorce – Marriage – Divorce – Divorce – Divorce is available for free reprint.

Should A Marriage Be Saved When A Woman Hates Sex?

Jarod was a client who was done with it and ready to leave his wife. “My wife Christina really does hate sex,” he told us. “At least since our kids were born. Is there any way you can help me so I want to save this marriage instead of hitting the road?”

Christina, at Jarod’s urging, came to see us as well. “I love Jarod but I can’t stand his touching me,” she said. “I know he’s ready to leave, but if it means that I have to put up with his sexual stuff, I don’t care if we save this marriage or not.”

If sex disgusts you – if it’s a bother – or a waste of time – or it hurts – or is repulsive – or makes you feel dirty – or used – or you never experience pleasure from it…you need to realize that your reactions are not normal. There have been many women who lost their marriages because of this issue.

The thing to remember is that people don’t start thinking or acting a certain way for no reason. If you think you’ve gone through all the causes, forward and backward, and have come to the conclusion that sex is still all the things we mentioned above, don’t pass on this yet. There may be one important factor missing that will instantly start the improvement.

So why bother? Because the sexual union between a man and a woman is ordained by God and, if it’s in the right context, is blessed and pleasurable. God designed it to bind a man and woman together physically and unite their souls.

All of these things tell you one thing. Only that sex is important to all of us on a number of levels: emotional, psychological and physical; and is the chemical glue that cements a relationship.

You’re missing out on one of the wonderful experiences of life that no woman should be without, if you reject lovemaking. Making love should be a delight to you, as well as your guy, and though it may surprise you, most men don’t really enjoy sex unless their wives are enjoying it, too. Having an orgasm starts to mean nothing to man who cannot please his partner. It becomes significantly less fun for him too. When we talk with a woman who doesn’t enjoy her sexual relationship with her husband, we uncover a number of reasons. These are three of the most common reasons:

What are we trying to say? Only that sex is important to all of us on a number of levels: emotional, psychological and physical; and is the chemical glue that cements a relationship.

* She had an authority figure who told her, as she was growing up, that men want women for nothing but to satisfy their sexual appetites. There are some bad apples who think this way, but most men do not.

When we talk with a woman who doesn’t enjoy her sexual relationship with her husband, we uncover a number of reasons. Here are three rather common ones: * There was a priest/pastor and/or a parent who told her that, according to the Bible, sex is dirty and shameful, and she should indulge in it only to have a baby. The Bible teaches no such thing. Rather, but rather just the opposite.

Our counseling experience has exposed these reasons and even more. If you treasure your marriage and want to save it, find out why you don’t enjoy sex with your guy and then determine to do everything you can to change the circumstances. We have written a lot about why women (or men) turn off in our books and material at www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com because we know how important it is to a relationship and to the stability of a marriage.

Tell your man today that you need his help because you are determined to conquer this: “I want our marriage to survive, Honey, and I know this is an important part of that.” He’ll be deeply grateful that you love him enough to try, not only to come to the point of desiring him, but because you want to save your marriage.

Tell your man today that you need his help because you are determined to conquer this: “I want our marriage to survive, Honey, and I know this is an important part of that.” He’ll be deeply grateful that you love him enough to try, not only to come to the point of desiring him, but because you want to save your marriage. Your goal will be to like – adore – cherish lovemaking – not dislike or just tolerate it. Otherwise, you may live to see the day when he walks out, never to return. Save your marriage – start on it today.

Margaret Hardisty International Best Selling Author and Speaker Dr. Vance Hardisty International Speaker and Author Love Relationship Headquarters www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com

Do you have relationship problems? You are not alone. Save your marriage today, and get separate help for men This article, Should A Marriage Be Saved When A Woman Hates Sex? is available for free reprint.

Is He Selling Drugs?

I saw my friend Gerry selling drugs recently. I accidentally ran into him downtown. He always had been conversant and he told me everything, “You aren’t going to turn me in, are you?” he asked. Actually, I wasn’t sure of his real name and I didn’t know where he lived, so that would have been difficult. Vance had become acquainted with him several years before, helped him turn his life around, at least temporarily, and brought him to our house. With Vance’s help, he had given up taking or selling drugs.

He’d had a hard life and really bad parents. His mother was a nurse who stole prescription drugs and allowed her children to use them. So his background had included stints in juvenile hall and later, prison. Before we met him, he’d had a baby by one woman he dearly loved, but because he was taking drugs and tended to be homicidal, she left him. He couldn’t save the relationship.

After Vance came into his life and Gerry was turning his life around, he married the next girlfriend but the same thing happened. He wanted to stay together but she was afraid of what could happen. He had married another women when I saw him again and, he told me, since he wanted a lot of money, for prestige as much as anything, he had gone back to selling drugs. The lure of easy money was too strong for him.

Like many people he could not break his bad habits. He had married another women when I saw him again and, he told me, since he wanted a lot of money, for prestige as much as anything, he had gone back to selling drugs.

Taking drugs, whether recreational or prescribed, is just plain foolish. When life becomes puzzling, hard and frustrating, many, unable to endure until they discover an answer, take the easy way out and alter reality with chemicals. Despite the fact that, for a short period of time while they are indulging they can forget their troubles, feel good and “handle it,” (as they all say), when they are clean, they discover that their problems are still there. Remember the commercial about this is your brain on drugs Just imagine how bad your problems become on drugs. Drugs add another dark and…shall we say it?… evil dimension to their lives, their marriages, their perception of things.

It is very difficult to heal a marriage if drugs are involved. In fact, it’s very difficult to deal at all with a person who indulges – because they go off the drugs, get into rehab, come out clean, get a new life – and then, like a dog going back to its own vomit, they do drugs again. When we deal with a troubled marriage or life that is complicated even further that way, we say to ourselves, “Tell me again why we are using our energy and time trying to help these people who won’t help themselves.”

There are some successes, though. Serenita came to a number of Bible studies in our home. She had been unable to save her marriage because of a drug habit and lost custody of her children. When we met her, she had been clean for two years. She had a job in her chosen field, and her right to visit weekly with her three daughters had been restored. She’s active in her church, and has a lot of people praying for her. She’s going to make it. If you are addicted, you can shed the demon and have victory, too.

Your spouse, your children, your extended family, and you have a beautiful life ahead of you once you get rid of this devilish habit once and for all. It has been done by many. You will need help, but the ultimate decision to conquer is yours. Through a system of self discovery you can identify your weaknesses. Then fight them as if you were a soldier going into battle and your life depended upon your using the weapons that are at your disposal against the enemy. Pray. Ask God for help. Then continue to do your part. Victory will be yours.

We have more on addictions as well as saving your marriage in our material and books at Love Relationship Headquarters. Come visit us and see how your life can be changed.

Margaret Hardisty International Best Selling Author and Speaker Dr Vance Hardisty International Speaker and Author Love Relationship Headquarters www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com

Do you have relationship problems? You are not alone. Millions have marriage problems Save your marriage today, and get separate help for women This article, Is He Selling Drugs? has free reprint rights.

The Sting Of An Unfaithful Spouse

Ethan, a professional man, was angry and calling his wife all sorts of names when he came to us. “She’s having an affair with a guy she met at a roller skating rink. I just found out.” He became very tearful. “What can I do? I love her. I want to save my marriage.” He swallowed hard. “I don’t understand. I’ve always been a good husband.”

But he hadn’t been a good husband – not really. At least, not in her opinion. When I had the chance to talk with her she told me, “I put up with him as long as I could. I needed someone who would love me the way I needed.” Although they blamed each other, both were at fault; but in her disillusionment she started looking elsewhere outside her marriage and “fell in love” with the first guy who gave her attention. She initiated an affair with him. That didn’t last, so she was off looking for another guy. Meanwhile their children floundered.

People have more reasons to justify their forays into adultery than a centipede has legs. Fortunately, physical adultery still shocks people – and especially if the faithless are famous, like Tiger Woods, or Jesse James, the husband of Sandra Bullock. At this time, it doesn’t look like either one is going to be able to save his marriage. Having sex outside your committed relationship can destroy your family, friends and spouse.

Mental infidelity and emotional disloyalty are adulterous, too. A person can have sex mentally with someone else and no one is the wiser unless the porn or email correspondence that reveals their indulgence is discovered. Emotional disloyalty, by choosing someone other than your spouse as your closest confidant and friend, when there are romantic undertones, chips away at married closeness and can escalate into physical betrayal.

V:3 When trust is lost, the marriage will follow. It is at that point in time that the one who cheated sometimes realizes just how much he/she has sacrificed, and there is a desire to make things better. Can it be done? Absolutely. Will it be easy? You already know the answer to that. But with the right information, it is a lot easier than most think.

Some of the biggest problems arise when the one who has had the affair is sorry, swears he/she will never do it again and then expects the offended one to forgive and forget and let the marriage go back to the way it was immediately. First of all, even if the other spouse can forgive, to rebuild trust is a process. It takes time and some very specific actions on the part of the offender. Second, though the one who has cheated often just wants things to go back to normal – they really DON’T want that. That NORMAL was what got them into trouble in the first place. What they want is a better, stronger, happier marriage. They just don’t know how to get it.

It is important to be clear. We are not advocating adultery in any way shape or form. It causes incredible pain and suffering to everyone involved and makes the process of crafting a better marriage much harder.

Let us be very clear. We are not advocating adultery in any way shape or form. It causes incredible pain and suffering to everyone involved and makes the process of crafting a better marriage much harder. If you are in a difficult union, it is far easier to start right now, using clearly defined steps, like those we at Love Relationship Headquarters have laid out, to make the marriage you have dynamic and exciting. You can save the marriage you are in now without going through the pain caused by cheating. Find us and all the steps you need, whether you have gone through the frustration of adultery or not at www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com

You ask us, “Can you save my marriage?” We would ask you to look in the mirror and ask, “Can WE save this marriage?” We can help, yes, but the actual process takes two – you and your spouse.

Margaret Hardisty International Best Selling Author and Speaker Dr. Vance Hardisty International Speaker and Author Love Relationship Headquarters www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com

Looking for marriage advice? You are not alone. 100′s of thousands have used our marriage advice. Marriage help is available , and get separate help for men Free reprint avaialable from: The Sting Of An Unfaithful Spouse.

Determined To Succeed

Lance Armstrong won the Tour de France so many times, despite the bitterness of the French press that tried to discredit him time and again, that it astonishes us. Cancer reduced him to the weakest he had ever been, but he rebuilt his body and became the unbelievable champion that he is through sheer will to live.

He proved himself to be a champion racer. He did not quite make it to champion father. With several legitimate and illegitimate children to his credit and discredit, he seems to show no remorse, at least publicly, over his apparent failure as a good husband or father.

Nevertheless, champion though he was on the bicycle, he was a dud when it came to relationships and marriage. With several legitimate and illegitimate children to his credit and discredit, he seems to show no remorse, at least publicly, over his apparent failure as a good husband or father. We say that because if he were a good husband, he would have worked on preserving his marriage, and wouldn’t have a bevy of “relationships” behind him. His legitimate children would still have a full time father, and his other children wouldn’t have to carry the stigma of illegitimacy around with them all of their lives.

Perhaps the fact that he was an illegitimate child, himself, that his birth father left him and his mother, and that his mother had married and divorced three times, had something to do with his attitude toward relationships Or perhaps it was his lack of faith as an agnostic. He is quoted as saying: At the end of the day, if there was indeed some body or presence standing there to judge me, I hoped I would be judged on whether I had lived a true life…

A true life? Excuse us? Yes, he was true to cycling. It does not seem that he was true in any way in his personal life. However, since we don’t know the man personally, it could be that he would have been true had his wives been true. We don’t know who was at fault, but if he is like the majority of men, and especially since he had to be gone much of the time to pursue his career, it is likely that he didn’t meet his wives’ and girlfriends’ emotional needs – essential for women.

Every marriage should have, as its goal, love that reaches the arte level, the Greek word for excellence. “That’s easy,” newlywed say when they still have the stars in their eyes. “We’re doing fine,” says the husband who isn’t meeting his wife’s emotional needs. “I’ve settled for less than what I desire,” says the wife who has given up hope.

That’s what our Love Relationship System is all about – showing couples how to reach that level of arte or close to it. Excellent relationships are the ones that stand the test of time and trails. Be willing to put the same indomitable spirit into making your marriage a victorious journey in life as Lance Armstrong has done to become a worldwide champion.

Be willing to put the same indomitable spirit into making your marriage a victorious journey in life as Lance Armstrong has done to become a worldwide champion; so that, unlike him, you can save your marriage and give your children that wonderful knowledge that they have steady, loving parents who will keep things together. We give you the tools and the keys for doing just that at www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com: separate tools both for men and for women. Come join us now for a sparkling future in your marriage.

Margaret Hardisty International Best Selling Author and Speaker Dr. Vance Hardisty International Speaker and Author Love Relationship Headquarters www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com

Looking for marriage advice? You are not alone. 100′s of thousands have used our marriage advice. We’ll show you how to save your marriage , and get separate help for men Also published at Determined To Succeed.

Healthy Body, Healthy Marriage

Mary had grown up slim. However, her figure tended to move outward a bit when it came to her thighs. Still, she was very attractive and looked good in her clothes. After she’d had three children, though, her body began to move outward all over. She liked the fact that it gave her bigger breasts, but the rest was depressing to her. Actually, she was feeling trapped. Her husband worked 50 hours a week and could not be there for his family.

Her unhappiness began to chip away at their relationship. Although he never mentioned her weight, she felt on the ugly side and took her frustrations out on him. He fought back and when other things began to pound at them, such as huge bills and a job loss, she decided the only way out of the whole mess was to get divorced. She no longer wanted to save the marriage.

Despite her foolish decision, she realized that she couldn’t go it alone . She hadn’t finished her education and at best she could get a low paying job. She was concerned about the welfare of her kids. She’d have to find another man, that was all, and to do so, she needed to lose weight.

Her decisions devastated her husband who didn’t spot the signs soon enough, and once he did, he refused to change anything he was doing to save his marriage. He wanted her to change, not him.

She also found another man and had an affair. The man was a dog, but because she was running from her hurt – and trying to run from herself as well as her husband – she couldn’t see that. The “dog” went his way, in time, and she scouted for another guy, found him – another dog – and in time, he went his way. Meanwhile she filed for divorce, and continued to do what she could to make her figure better. V:3

The question is: Why couldn’t she realize that her overeating and not taking care of her body was part of the whole picture of unhappiness that she was experiencing and that it eventually would result in the loss of her marriage? Why couldn’t her ex-husband see that, as well, and do something about it before it was too late? The weight was a distraction because it was not the root of the problem. V:3

If overweight is a monster gnawing at you, determine to do something about it now so you don’t lose your marriage Yes, it’s a symptom, but getting rid of a symptom can help with getting to the root of the real problems. Problems can cause emotional stress and physical illness and it all can tie in with being overweight. The body is a marvelous machine. Every part of your body is connected to every other part in some way.

Keep in mind, when the ball comes swishing toward your bat, you’re the only one who can be there swinging. Either you practice until you hit it or you drop your bat and trot back to the dugout. You have to do it yourself. This is one thing you must do on your own. We have quite a bit of material on this at Love Relationship Headquarters. And as far as your marriage is concerned, no matter how bad or boring you think it may be, unless it is abusive, it’s worth saving – not only for your sake but for your husband’s and your children’s.

We have quite a bit of material on this at Love Relationship Headquarters. And as far as your marriage is concerned, no matter how bad or boring you think it may be, unless it is abusive, it’s worth saving – not only for your sake but for your husband’s and your children’s. We show you how, not only to save your marriage, but how to make it better and, frankly, exciting. Get started on our materials and books today so your home will be a happy, peaceful one, not one filled with strife and fat bodies.

Dr. Vance Hardisty International Speaker and Author Margaret Hardisty International Best Selling Author and Speaker Love Relationship Headquarters www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com

All marriages are worth saving, Save your marriage today, and get separate help for men. Check here for free reprint licence: Healthy Body, Healthy Marriage.

Three Steps To Improving Communication In Your Marriage

Most marriage problems stem from a lack of communication in the marital relationship. While most couples would tell you that they work hard to communicate with their spouse, most spouses feel that there is a lack of communication on their partner’s behalf. This is mostly because from each person’s perspective they believe that they are effectively communicating their point of view, but the information is not being clearly received on the other side.

A lack of communication, however, is actually something that can be resolved relatively simply and one of the best ways to resolve it is to set up communication rules. This means basically guidelines that will help improve the effectiveness of your communication as a couple.

1. Utilize A Speaking Item- One of the main problems with effective communication is that couples tend to speak at the same time, trying to get their points across. This leads to them being unable to hear and take in what the other is saying, therefore making it more difficult to resolve the issue they are facing. Instead of speaking at one time, have an item (such as a stick or a shell) and use it as the speaking item. When someone is speaking they will hold this item and the other is only allowed to sit there and listen. Once the first person is finished with what they have to say it is then time to pass the item to the listener, who will now become the speaker. It is very important that you do not speak unless you are holding the item. This will allow for each to get their points across as well as listen closely at what your partner is saying.

2. Stick To The Subject- Many times when a couple tries to communicate they start bringing up other issues from the past. They have such a history together that one thing leads to another and then finally back into an argument. Addressing only one issue at a time can really help to focus the communication so that both partners are on the same page.

3. A Wait Period- Try not to address issues immediately, but instead have a waiting period. Usually when something first happens everyone is a little more defensive and agitated. Creating a specific day and time to sit and discuss issues for the week, is a better way to address situations. After a little time has passed you will probably be better able to communicate about the subject without turning the communication into a heated argument.

If you are experiencing marriage problems, log onto www.lightyourfire.com immediately. We will help you avoid divorce, and and remove the need for you to look up save my marriage on the internet.

The ABC’s Of A Successful Marriage

When you are searching the internet for ways to strengthen your marriage, you are bond to find millions of articles on couples therapy, but very few on the things that you and your husband can do to keep your marriage strong without any outside influences. In fact having a successful marriage is just a matter of following the ABC’s.

A- One thing that you need for a successful marriage is to ALWAYS treat one another with respect. Although you may hear that love is the foundation for every marriage, there can not be a feeling of love, without a feeling of respect for each other. When there is no respect in the marriage you will find that there will be a lack of communication and therefore a breakdown in the marriage relationship that you are trying to build up.

B- Have you ever looked at an elderly married couple and wonder how they have dealt with each other for so long? The answer is simple, they are each others BEST friend. Your spouse needs to be someone that you trust with your life, feel secure with and share your deepest secrets and desires. It is simple to share a bed and a home with someone, however having a meaningful relationship is not that simple. When you and your spouse are each others best friend you have the main ingredient for a long lasting, healthy marriage.

C- Always be willing to CARRY your spouse up the difficult hills of life, as well as being willing to allow your spouse to carry your at your times of need. Everyone faces a personal tragedy in their life and during those times it is important to have someone that is strong for them.

S- Marriage is the most SACRED part of your relationship. It should be in the most important aspect of your life and nothing should every take priority above it. When you treat your marriage as something very special and unique you are setting yourself up for a very happy life with your spouse.

Avoid marriage problems logging onto www.lightyourfire.com. It is a place where you can read advice and testimonies as well as purchase programs that are a form of in home marriage counseling.

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